The news alchemists at Fox have done it again. During his speech Friday in Roanoke, Virginia, President Obama had this to say about the wealthy getting help on their way up the financial ladder:
"There are a lot of wealthy, successful Americans who agree with me -- because they want to give something back. They know they didn't -- look, if you've been successful, you didn't get there on your own. You didn't get there on your own. I'm always struck by people who think, well, it must be because I was just so smart. There are a lot of smart people out there. It must be because I worked harder than everybody else. Let me tell you something -- there are a whole bunch of hardworking people out there. If you were successful, somebody along the line gave you some help. There was a great teacher somewhere in your life. Somebody helped to create this unbelievable American system that we have that allowed you to thrive. Somebody invested in roads and bridges. If you've got a business -- you didn't build that. Somebody else made that happen. The Internet didn't get invented on its own. Government research created the Internet so that all the companies could make money off the Internet. The point is, is that when we succeed, we succeed because of our individual initiative, but also because we do things together."
That's what the president actually said (in shades of Elizabeth Warren). Fox and Friends, however, chose to edit out the parts they didn't serve their Obama Hates Small Business narrative, like the whole bit about succeeding because we do things together. Details on that debacle is here.
If that weren't enough (and it never is), Fox Nation served up this gem: "Obama Insults Small Business Owners."
Breathe in. Take a minute to savor. Ahhhhh…. Admittedly, such genius is daunting but it should not deter us from writing Fox headlines of our own. Here are three recent stories:
- World sea piracy falls in first 6 months of 2012
- Lemurs Are The World's Most Threatened Mammal, Study Says
- Fiat says it will offer world's first in-car coffee maker
Given the Fox Nation treatment they might read:
- Citing Dire Obama-conomy, Sailors Give Up Looking For Work
- "We're The Most Threatened," Whines Foreign Special Interest Group
- U.S. Cars Trounced By Competitors After Obama Bailouts
Now it's your turn. Infoxify the above three headlines and we'll post the winners tomorrow. Enjoy!
Leave a Comment:
Terror on the High Seas: Somalian Pirates
Monkey-Huggers want Government Aid
Fiat Declares War on Starbucks
3. Libs Demand Diamond-Encrusted Espresso Machine in Hippie Cars.
2. Obama Regulations Threaten Lemur Population
1. Pirates suffer worst job losses under Obama economy: Report
"Obama's Fast and Furious ties to nautical cover up Avast ye ahoy. International big brother policies kill free market and limit job opportunities."
"Obama and muslim brotherhood ties demand that coffee made in american cars be black and strong"
1. Obama Disses Disney
2. White House indifferent to mammal plight
3. Foreign autos deliver more perks
1. Southampton: Romney Supporters on 75 Foot Yacht Create Safe Seas
2. Clear Case of Voter Fraud Causing Extinction
3. "Joe" Biden: Socialist Insider
1. Economy So Bad "There's Nothing Even Left to Steal," Claims Foreign Job Creator
2. Obama Environmental Regulation Leads to Long Tail of Woe
3. Fiat Move Means No Grounds to Believe Rescue Benefited U. S. Auto Industry
1. Due to excessive regulations, pirates abandoning trade.
2. Obama support for African Warlords killing off lemurs.
3. Obama declares war against coffee; no more coffee in your commute.
1. Obama Disses Disney
2. White House indifferent to mammal plight
3. Foreigh autos deliver more perks
Blackbeard Salvage Operation's profits sink to all time low as Obama cheers at laid-off workers.
Homosexual agenda leads to slaughter- "lemur is the new pink!"
Obama sells all oil back to homeland in Iran; price of coffee soars as Italians resort to espresso as a fuel source.
Concerned Sailors Avoid Seasickness in Wake of Obamacare.
Lemurs: Latest Victims of Failing Obama Administration?
Obama car Industry Bailout Wasted on Research for Luxurious Lifestyles.
Actually, BOTH sides are guilty of editing to suit their viewpoint. I'm sick of it. I won't play the game, because it can be played by Mitt's followers too.
That's who started the blame game. They have nothing else.
Lemurs Encouraged To Become Less Sloth-like
Over-Regulation Cripples High Seas Entrepreneurs
Is Planed Parenthood Destroying Animal Lives? Lemur Experts Want to Know
Foreign Auto Maker Drugs Customers with Caffeine: Will Obama Remain Silent?
Piracy In 2012: Obama Blames Banks
Obamacare Threatens Mammals: World-Wide Crisis
Fiat Drugs Drivers
1) Federal Regulations Strangle Coastal Small Businesses
2) Obama Fails to Protect Another Species
3) Even Socialist Car Companies are Outpacing Bailed-Out American Autos
1. Obamacare Even Kills Jobs Overseas
2. Obama Government Sprawl Invading Lemur Habitat
3. AutO-bamanation: Fiat Surges to Number 1
Piracy down, proving that global warming is a hoax.
(ever seen the correlation between piracy and global warming?)
Obama committing Lemur Genocide
Fiat to pander to Liberal Elites
1. Pirate King Obama Fails to Stop Piracy
2. Obama Feasted on Lemurs as a Child, Now Species is Gone
3. Romney Retroactively Invents First in-car Coffeemaker, Sells to Fiat
most excellent
Over-Regulation Cripples High Seas Entrepreneurs
Is Planed Parenthood Destroying Animal Lives? Lemur Experts Want to Know
Foreign Auto Maker Drugs Customers with Caffeine: Will Obama Remain Silent?
GOP urges lemurs to become less sloth-like
That was FUN!
Socialist over-regulation crushing small businesses off southern coast.
Are secular scientists eradicating Lemurs to cover up evidence that refutes evolution? You decide.
Obama turns blind eye as Italy and Columbia join forces to destroy US economy.
Market for offshore goods falls under Obama.
Obama Administration threatens the existence of small, fuzzy animals.
Price of coffee jumps to $35,000 per cup after auto industry bailout.
Brilliant!
Do all the Small Businesses really want support from Fox News?
If so then it would be good for them to tell that to their customers, put a Fox News Logo prominently displayed at your place of business, right next to the one from the "United States Chamber of Commerce". Then the Small Business Owner can thank to high heaven the Chamber and Fox News for all the help they have provided over the years and make a few remarks about effectiveness of the government agency known as the U.S. Small Business Administration.
No one is going to notice that function of supporting small businesses has been delegated to a government agency, so that the Chamber can work on its main line business. You can ignore the fact the Chambers main line businesses is in politics. And gloss over the odd notions that if business were all that good at solving problems, that they would not always have their hand out to the government. In fact pay no attention to the possibility that if businesses were that amazing, that they could have purchased all politicians already.
Frankly if anyone bothered to sort out politics of big business, small business and government they might conclude that they together make more of problem than of solution. Take out your accounting pencils and green eye shades, and apply the word "efficiency" to those four groups, just to see the bottom line?
1) Fox News issues display logos for Small Business Owners.
2) Fox News and US Chamber of Commerce in Joint Venture for SBO.
3) Fox News and Chamber Leverage buyout of US-SBA , business helping business.