Here’s a nice safe way to attack President Obama: go after him for what might happen if he is re-elected in November. You know, what if? Let's pretend?
Such is the vision of one John Hawkins, a “professional blogger who runs Right Wing News” who has written a super helpful column called “7 Things to Expect If Obama Is Elected to a Second Term.” Luckily for America, John Hawkins, the “professional blogger who runs Right Wing News” has secret knowledge into the nefarious inner workings of President Obama’s brain and knows exactly what will transpire during the tragic years 2013-2017. To wit:
- America's credit rating slides further
- The middle class will see massive tax increases
- Gas and energy prices will be dramatically higher
- Obamacare goes into effect
- The Supreme Court moves to the left
- Get ready for open borders
- Gun control will be a priority
Gaze into the Eye of Sauron and despair! But that can’t be all President Obama is plotting, can it? Are these headlines not in our future, too??
French Election Observers Ratify Obama Landslide
Obama Abolishes NASCAR ..."Wasteful" Vehicles Re-purposed For Occupying U.N. Re-education Force
Homeland Culture Police to Enforce 2014: A Year Without Meat
Obama Named Grand Marshal of Muslim Brotherhood's Sharia Claus Thanksgiving Day Parade
TRMS'ers, do you foresee America's baleful demise, as well? Please share your dire premonitions of Obama's diabolical second term in the comments.
Please--save us.
Leave a Comment:
After a shaky beginning with one and two, three through seven are all interesting conversation starters.
and still with the lies about the gun control. It's just so cute to watch people who call themselves good Christians lie so ineptly.
Obama opens borders for no-work welfare for entire world
Obama criminalizes anyone with blonde hair and blue eyes
Obama makes mid-west into private cracked clay tennis court
Obama makes mid-west into private cracked clay tennis court
Sorry, Just had to point this out as absolutely hilarious and amazingly clever!!!
They render satire obsolete .
The only thing left , Is it a Republican talking point or the Onion ? You Decide
Are those who call themselves good Christians necessarily good Christians in fact, Velkyn? The Taliban went around Kabul beating up men whose beards weren't long enough, but there were many Muslims who said that wasn't what Islam was all about.
There seems to be a pattern: Some who call themselves devout Christians/Muslims/Jews insist on literal interpretations of their canonical texts, focus on the details and minutiae of dress and ritual, yet miss the greater spirit and meaning of the religion they claim to adhere to. They typically want to enforce their theologies on others, because that's how they keep the high of feeling that they're the sole possessors of the one and only truth. Islamic Taliban and Christian Taliban are mere isomers of each other. It shouldn't surprise anyone that they lie to themselves and others, or that their lies are so transparent.
I PREDICT: Obama will use the large hadron collider to open a wormhole to hell on 12/21. It's all ID chips and gay marriages from there.
That was brilliant. Love it!
Love the wormhole bit!
The last election found us at the edge of the precipice....this one finds us clawing our way out....too bad Congress can't build a ladder to bridge the gaps...maybe we all should consider how THOSE forces have affected progress...
Alas, Sofferclese, there is no way to tell who the "TrueChristians" (or TrueMuslims) are. One can make up anything from the supposed holy book a religion has. I've repeatedly asked for theists to come to altars just like in the OT and prove for once who the "real" ones are by getting their god to light the altar of its choice. But sadly, no one ever accepts that challenge. You'd think they had no faith....
Now, as soon as we can figure out who the theists are with the real god, then we could be good to go. But as you pointed out, they all (liberal versions, conservative versions) have all made up their own lies about what their god "really wants", that all "lie to themselves and others, or that their lies are so transparent."
and yes, the LHC is a portal to hell. or maybe a "stargate", and then we can all worship goa'uld as "gods".
Obama abolishes NASCAR; jealous that HE doesn't know team owners. Gives brightly colored cars to Malia, Sasha and their friends.
Obama doesn't abolish NASCAR, but implements that only smart cars and electric cars can be used.
The World calls Obama "the bane of our existence" and Signals Batman to the Rescue.
“bane” means; a) A cause of harm, ruin, or death or b) A source of persistent annoyance ...
America's credit rating slides further.
This one is my favorite . Obama caused a reduction in the credit rating
That self effacing little prick Rince Priebus repeated that meme on meet the Village.
The teabaggers (I'm talking to You Ryan ) who blocked a routine parliamentary procedure caused the decrease in the country's credit rating.
Lying with impunity
Our new motto
We lie , you decide
The end of the happy meal. Obama abolishes corporate fast food chain profits, declares "children eat for free".
Don't tread on my Happy Meal!!!!!
New Prediction: Gay Broccoli Farmers given special Chicago-style loans by Solyndra.
Obamacare requires vegetables at every meal. Outlaws snack time.
When snack time is outlawed, only outlaws will have snacks... they can have my Swiss cake rolls and Peppermint Patties when they pry them from my cold, dead (sticky) hands!
;-)
Super Bowl XLVII cancelled, replace by Hunger Games I.
Well, come on now. You forgot the Reeducation Camps. I'm very much looking forward to the Reeducation Camps. And think what it will do for Rachel's ratings when we strap them into chairs with their eyes clamped open, like in "Clockwork Orange" and force them to watch TRMS.
Romney's bank accounts nationalized.....D.C. renamed Obamatown. Entitlement recipients issued free automatic weapons, gun prices increased tenfold for red states .....Fox news forced to move to Cartoon Channel....Big oil corporations forced to post trillion dollar safety bond on pipelines, wells and refineries.
Love this, love this, love this. I can't say it enough!
Dammit man, I *like* all of those! Especially good is Fox news to the Cartoon Channel and safety bonds for oil companies.
Obama comes out the closet "I am a Muslim"
Obama says Canter is "a Crazy Cracker" at press conference
Democracy ends, Socialism Begins in Obama's 2nd term
Biden : GOP is a Big F*cking Joke
Sharia Law established: Convert or Die!
Actually, that second one is true...
As is the fourth one.
Calvin
Can I add Romeny and Ryan to number 2?
Obama causes the poor to get smarter and healthier. Armageddon ensues.
Obama replaces Department of Justice with ACORN
But #4, #5 and #7 would be GREAT! I'm not scared!
Study Finds Straight Marriage Now 'A Thing of the Past' As Gay Marriage Becomes the New Norm
TV is ahead of you:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_New_Normal_(TV_series)
...and with the repeal of DOMA, all opposite-sex marriages are invalidated.
Everybody's taxes are going up no matter who gets elected, and to the extent that we recover at all, gas and energy prices too. None of that is tied to Obama, but to market forces however.
Bernanke is right that monetary policy has gone about as far as it can reasonably take us and fiscal policy must replace the Fed's current role as deus ex machina.
I'm really tired of trying to read this page and I have to close MSNBBC's own freaking popups. Wth, I thought we were over that crap.
stop using internet explorer
When clicking on a MaddowBlog post on Facebook, you get a popup asking you to allow it to post on Facebook. I'm using Chrome and get it too.
lose the Bing and MSN , your life will be easier
Try Firefox with AdBlock.
Try unchecking the little box under the comment dialog that says "Post to my Facebook Wall".
;-)
GM introduces the Obama - a new line of black helicopters.
Obama appoints 22-year old Affirmative Action student from Occidental College to SCOTUS.
Malia forced to perform on Dancing with the Stars to rally Obama's failing popularity
America re-named Obamerica, Caucasians to pay 10% more in taxes than everyone else.
Obama Death Panels establish maximum lifespan. Everyone that age and older must be euthanized and turned into Solent Green for human consumption.
Obama oversees the creation of Carrousel and the establishment of the elite Sandmen Corps. (Okay, I'm mixing stories here. Sorry.)
Obama Gathers Up All Crazy Tea Party People; Relocates Them to the Area 51 Desert Surrounded with Big Fence.
That's the crazy headline I would really like to see.
I like your idea. If I may expand on it? Area 51 is too easy. Let Obama ship 'em to Iran for perspective readjustment.
There they could experience the reality of women's rights, religious prosecution, freedom of speech, and liberties. Perhaps undeniable reality untempered by coddling media would help tea partiers be grateful for what they have back home, and quit trying to destroy it.
Maybe hand these NRA sympathizers a gun and toss them into a few authentic conflicts with actual non-simulated bullets flying over head to remind them what it's like to be sent to foreign shores to fight FOR America instead of against her, and even maybe give them a real life understanding of what American shooting victims go through. Nothing like the reality of a bullet to make you rethink your life.
Maybe kick them outside the Green Zone and let them discover first hand what a REAL enemy is, rather than the safe make-pretend enemy they "fight" at home, othewise known as their neighbors and fellow countrymen, whose only ammunition against them is a vote.
And then finally, when each and every one of those tea party crazies are quaking and crying to come back to US soil, Obama can then deport them to Mexico without passports to gain those last few life lessons in poverty, human ingenuity, and athletics like swimming and running.
I like what you say except when it comes to guns. In fact, toss out the guns and I love it.
Fun fact when it comes to gun violence: When you exclude suicides, all killings perpetrated with firearms in the united states amount to one fiftieth of the death toll from heart disease (check the CDC's figures, I did), secondary fun fact: in a country with ready access to antibiotics, more people die of Pneumonia every year than are killed in human-on-human violence involving firearms.
One of the anti-gun rants that is most rankling to rational, intelligent gun owners is the immortal meme of our wanting to greedily preserve our right to own firearms and that this greed creates a system in which criminals and crazies get access to firearms and do wickedness with them.
Here's the answer to that that either no one on the left hears or that they just don't get when they do hear it: "I personally have never done anything illegal or dangerous with a firearm. The minute I do, you can have *it* and *me*."
Great work on the whole "send the Tea-Party to Iran thing." Beautiful.
Cats and Dogs Live Together - Madness!
Sesame Street Renamed 'Marx and Lenin Boulevard' by President-for-life Obama
Kenya Retroactively Declared 51st American State
Rush Limbaugh Disappeared! Talent On Loan From God Repossessed
Heterosexual Marriage Dissolved in Favor of Mandatory Gay Marriage!
USA Renamed "Socialist States of America"
Jesus Returns But Is Sentenced to Death by Sarah Palin Memorial Death Panel
Bwahahahahahaha! Good one!
;-)
Let's not forget too that all women, regardless of religion, will be forced to use birth control whether they want it or not...
Even post menopausal women!
Everyone knows that in his second term, Obama will make abortions mandatory for all non-atheist embryos.
LOL. Thanks, Rachel. Kind of made my day with that list. I especially love that NASCAR is finally laid to rest.
Please note that Kent Jones wrote this, as he does most of the Maddow Blogs we read. No affront to Rachel, I love her also; only that credit should be given where credit is due.
Please note further that Steve Benen writes most of the MaddowBlogs, with able assistance from others of the TRMS staff. Kent (a long-time collaborator of Dr. Maddow's going back to the Air America days) writes most of the really funny ones!